Her cheeks flush with some emotion she can't quite name, and she looks back down at her book for a few moments, hoping perhaps the bond will cut out and spare them both.
When it doesn't happen, she takes a deep breath and braces for the end of whatever understanding they were about to come to.
"I thought it better if it were someone I knew. There weren't as many Tian-aligned people here, and if I waited it might've had to be a stranger."
She can't quite make herself look at him, or speak the name she knows will hurt.
She doesn't give a straight answer, but she gives him enough clues. There are very few people here who she had met before, and only one who he knows has the correct alignment to be of benefit to her. One he knew perfectly well that she had talked to about his future self. Her reticence seals it.
"Him." That's not a question, either. He doesn't know what to say beyond that, but he can't keep up just idly sitting next to her. He gets to his feet, needing to move. Needing to put an extra step between them.
She stands as well, though she doesn't pursue him. She hadn't done anything wrong; they weren't even speaking. And even if they had been -- well, he was the wrong alignment. He wouldn't have been an option immediately, anyway, even if they might've chosen it out of familiarity eventually.
"There weren't better options. He's not--"
She cuts herself off, inwardly cursing herself for even feeling as though she needs to defend her choice.
"Of course you didn't." He spits the words back. It's not that he doesn't believe her, but more that he's kicking himself for not having expected her to, without direct intent to hurt him, do the one thing here that would hurt him the most. If he had any sense at all, he would have known that's the choice she'd make. When will he learn?
He's honestly not certain whether the bond cuts on its own, or whether it's the sudden break in his trust that makes it happen. All he knows is that he's suddenly alone again, and he won't even know how she intended to respond to that. Maybe it's for the better, either way.
Whatever retort she's working on dies on her lips as the bond cuts out and is replaced by a string of curses in at least three different languages. Of course the Force would do this now - or Kylo had. She's honestly not sure which, and it doesn't matter. Not really. Not when she shouldn't have been talking to him in the first place.
She picks up her book from where she'd let it drop in her haste and heads back toward the apartments. She's not going to seek him out again, not when she doesn't owe him an explanation. Not when it's just going to end the way all their other interactions had.
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chiming
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Date: 2022-09-12 03:27 am (UTC)From:When it doesn't happen, she takes a deep breath and braces for the end of whatever understanding they were about to come to.
"I thought it better if it were someone I knew. There weren't as many Tian-aligned people here, and if I waited it might've had to be a stranger."
She can't quite make herself look at him, or speak the name she knows will hurt.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-12 03:35 am (UTC)From:"Him." That's not a question, either. He doesn't know what to say beyond that, but he can't keep up just idly sitting next to her. He gets to his feet, needing to move. Needing to put an extra step between them.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-12 03:43 am (UTC)From:"There weren't better options. He's not--"
She cuts herself off, inwardly cursing herself for even feeling as though she needs to defend her choice.
"I didn't do it to hurt you."
no subject
Date: 2022-09-12 03:59 am (UTC)From:He's honestly not certain whether the bond cuts on its own, or whether it's the sudden break in his trust that makes it happen. All he knows is that he's suddenly alone again, and he won't even know how she intended to respond to that. Maybe it's for the better, either way.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-12 04:07 am (UTC)From:She picks up her book from where she'd let it drop in her haste and heads back toward the apartments. She's not going to seek him out again, not when she doesn't owe him an explanation. Not when it's just going to end the way all their other interactions had.
This is better, after all.