(no subject)

[forcecalls]

(scattered excerpts from the writings of Ben Solo, formerly Kylo Ren, formerly Jedi, formerly Sith, now undefined)

[What follows are the musings of a man trying to wrap his mind around what he is, to define a new generation, and to keep himself busy in the way his wife asked him to. They will be in no particular order, probably not even chronological.]

[relevant psl]

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Dyad

[forcecalls]

I wonder, now, whether it might be pure coincidence that I even knew such a thing as a "Dyad in the Force" existed. It was something Snoke mentioned offhand once; a prophecy about the end of the Jedi at the hands of two who were one. He never seemed to put much stock in it. He may have even forgotten it, given how blind he was to the true connection between Rey and myself. If he had noticed, would he have tried to use her the way he did me? But he didn't, and it was his downfall. An end to the Sith along with the Jedi, but of course the prophecy ignored that part. Rey has yet to fully give up the Jedi name, so maybe it was wrong.

I didn't pay much attention, either, when he said it. I had always been alone; how could this legendary connection between two people have anything to do with me? But something about that idea stuck with me. Maybe some part of me realised, or maybe it was my loneliness that made the idea appealing. Still I, too, had nearly forgotten about it, until her.

There are no words adequate to describe what Rey is to me. "Two that are one." She is my other half, a part of my soul. We feel what the other feels, connect across distances. I think I was aware of her, somehow, before we had even met. Not consciously. But something about her has always been familiar to me, beyond the vast amounts of experience we share (...despite the vast difference in our experiences.)

If I start to write out what I feel for her, it might be years before I stop. I'll spare everyone the trouble.

I do wonder about others. "Not seen for generations" was what Palpatine had said about the strength of our bond. There have been dyads before, then, but I have no way of knowing whether there is any record of them. I wonder if their lives were anything like ours. If their love was anything like ours.